Undecided
by forever.drifting.in.my.world
Summary: Bella finds herself unable to decide who she truly loves, and soon she finds herself cheating on Edward. But what will happen when she finds herself pregnant? Whos the dad?
1. Chapter 1

My eyes ached from crying so much,my back stiff from the position I was in. Curled up on my bedroom floor, my quilt wrapped around my shaking body, was what i was reduced to.Between sobs I thought about my situation, which only brought on more tears. I could not decide, would never be able to. The truth was, I loved them both. And there seemed to be no way around it. It was a few days ago that Jake kissed me in the forest, when I was hiding from the attacking vampires. When I realized I loved him. My passion for Jake matched that of Edward's, which brought me to this sniveling mass of tears. Pitiful. I sniffed and blew my nose on my old patchwork quilt, resting my head on the hard floor. After begging Edward to leave me alone, and telling Charlie to screw off numerous times, I was thankful for some "me" time. I sat up and ran my fingers through my tatty hair, recluctantly standing up. I winced as I strectched my back, which was extremely sore from lying on the floor, crying, for over 3 hours. I just couldnt bring myself to lay in my bed, the bed that Edward had made love to me in. Yes, he finally gave in, the night the vampire attack ended. But now I saw it as a big mistake. Because he gave his love to me, and I in other words "gave it away". I cheated. 


	2. Chapter 2

It was the night before, and I was over at La Push. Since Alice couldnt see me when I was with the woloves, I was safe. For now.

I was lying on Jake's small, lumpy bed, him beside me, his arm around my shoulder. I just couldnt stay away from him. It was almost like I was drawn to him, like sweet, seduction perfume. I just had to be near him.

"Bella, are you sure? I dont want you to be with me out of pity" Jake said, his voice wavering. "Jake, I'm sure. Really. I love you, you know" I said with a smile, and when he looked at me with that excited sparkle in his eye, my insides melted like chocolate. He really was my sun. He made me so happy when i was around him, I almost forget what im doing to Edward.

"Bella, I want you" He said in a soft voice, his whispers tickling my ear. I stifled a giggle before his lips interupted me, and it was all down hill from there.

It the next day that I went back to Edward, my arms wrapped around him, holding him as tight as I could. "I love you Bella" He said, his velvety voice like music to my ears. It almost hurt me, the way he said he loved me. He didnt even know that his love wasnt fully returned, that I loved another. A single tear slide down my cheek.

"Bella, whats wrong?" He said immediatly sensing my sadness. He pulled away and held me at arms length, searching my eyes. Even though he couldnt read my mind, I looked away, afraid he could see through me.

"Im fine, really. I just... have alot of things on my mind. You know, homework, Charlie, the usual." I was a terrible liar, and i pleaded he wouldnt notice.

"Bella, my love. Victoria is gone for good, ok? Dont worry" He smiled my favourite crooked smile, and I couldnt help but smile back. "You'll get through it. You always do." He kissed me gently, and i hopped out of the Volvo, making my way to my house.

It wasnt until a week later that i knew something was wrong.

I had missed my period, which was usually really regular, and was feeling a little nausous.

I had always suspected the reason, but I just couldnt let myself believe it. Edward cant concieve, because hes a vampire. And Jake? We were protected.

But as time went on, I became more and more agitated, worried that my suspision was true.

I gathered up my courage and finally bought an at home pregancy test, which I used right when I got home. After peeing on the little plastic stick, I let it sit before going to check on it. My eyes widened as I gazed upon the tiny pink plus sign.

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" I screamed, picking up the damn thing and shaking it, hoping that maybe it would change. But it didnt, the plus sign bold as ever.

I broke down, curling to the floor in the fetal position, my hands wrapped around my head. I couldnt be true, i thought. It just cant.

But the proof was sitting at arms length away, and there was no denying that it did make sense. My sobs quickened, becoming louder and shaky. I drew in small ragged breaths, forcing myself to breathe.

Could Edward be the father? Was that possible? Or was it Jake? How can i take care of baby? A million questions wizzed through my mind, coming to me quicker than I could answer them.

I didnt even hear the pounding footsteps that raced up to my room, only the loud nap of my door as it swung open and someone stepped in. 


End file.
